I’ve decided to post the lessons I learn from my patients while I am in
my clinicals. Hopefully, I don’t have much to say in this area, because
every time I learn a lesson, it most likely means something bad has
happened to me.

Lesson 1:  If your elderly patient is on a feeding tube and her
stomach is distended (2x its normal size), when you go to change her
diaper, roll her butt AWAY from you. Sudden movements will cause a lot of
that built up gas to escape quickly, and you do not want to be in the
line of fire.

Lesson 2:  It is always a good idea to check the bulletin board to
see what your patients will be eating during the week. Jot down any
days they will be served peanuts or corn, and make sure you call in
sick the morning following that meal.

Lesson 3: The cute little old ladies are the ones that yell at you the loudest.

Lesson 4: No matter how grossed out you are by needles, do not close
your eyes when giving someone any type of injection. Especially when
you are practicing finger pricks on your friends. They get mad when you
almost poke them in the fingernail instead of by the pad of their
finger. Sorry Danielle!!


4 thoughts on “Lessons

  1. I think you meant "roll her TOWARD you…," because that would put the gas-emitting orifice AWAY from you.And I forgot to ask if you know the one about fortune cookies, since you will be laughing at weddings (and funerals and christenings if you read those entries) from here on out. When you read a fortune cookie in the future, think, or say "…between the sheets," or "…behind the barn" after the words from the fottune. Then they will ALWAYS make you laugh. Another friend told me to also do it with road signs… but I dang near wrecked the car, so I don\’t advise it. Try the yellow pages if you\’re really bored. LOL!!! Or if you\’re in the doctor\’s office and they only have some boring booklet to read while you wait, use that. Hours of amusement at your command. Newspaper headlines sometimes work as well.

  2. Hi ya, thank you for visiting my space… Your Space is very cute.. I like the Cat in your profile… Is that your Cat? Big kiss x Cindy x

  3. HA! I always wondered what you all came up with to deal will all the, uh, unpleasantness of those duties. I don\’t know why, but hospital stories are fascinating to me, I\’m ADDICTED to Discovery Health Channel. Its my dirty little secret…not anymore I guess!

  4. Katie!Holy Mole! I am laughing so hard and I have only read up to your October 17th posting! I too went to Nursing school and have some clinical stories that could make you check yourself into a mental institution. I can relate to all that I have read so far!I look forward to reading your postings and following you through your clinicals! Stay strong and keep the Vicks vapor rub under your nose! It comes in handy!Tricia

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